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We are the Sultans. We are the Sultans of Swing.

Zachary Jones @ZJ

26, Male

Radio Producer

University of Cincinnati

Washington, D.C.

Joined on 7/5/06

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ZJ's News

Posted by ZJ - July 5th, 2019

My NG account is now old enough to sign up for a Newgrounds account.

Thanks for the laughs ya dorks!




Posted by ZJ - July 5th, 2018

I signed up for an NG account on this day in 2006. It’s been 12 years and I still don’t regret that decision. Love you guys.




Posted by ZJ - July 5th, 2017

I signed up for an NG account on this day in 2006. Happy to still be here. Let's see how much farther I can go!




Posted by ZJ - October 21st, 2016

I've been alive for 24 years now. I still feel like I'm 12. The End. 



Posted by ZJ - July 5th, 2016

On this day in 2006, I signed up for a user account on this website. 10 years later, I'm still having a blast on here. Thanks for everything guys.



Posted by ZJ - May 16th, 2016

I was at Pico Day this year. It was my third time making the trip out to the NG office!

In years past, I've written up huge posts that talked about all of the cool things I did at the event, but I don't have the energy for that now. So, I'll just thank @EthanAlways for riding on the SEPTA train with me on the way to the event, @yurgenburgen for being so handsome, @Luis letting for stay at his place for a night, @ColonelCheru and her gang for letting me play Secret Hitler with them, @Zachary and the rest of the Goon Squad Crew (@4cat, @Gobblemeister, @Jay, @EJR, @Minion777, @Ryan, @Shikamarana, and others) for being awesome,  @AlmightyHans for talking in-depth with me about film making, @Deathink for including me in this, and @TomFulp for hosting the event and showing off his wicked cool game.

Big shout out to the local homies I saw while there: @SardonicSamurai, @Afro-Ninja, and @Nalem.

Also, big shout out to @Grub-xer0 for letting me steal his WWE title belt again.



Posted by ZJ - October 21st, 2015

I had another birthday today. I'm getting too old for this crap!




Posted by ZJ - July 5th, 2015

I signed up for an account on Newgrounds.com on this day in 2006. Nine years later, I'm still here and still having fun. Let's see if we can make it to 10 years.

Okay, I'm going to bed. Bye. 




Posted by ZJ - May 1st, 2015

So, last weekend, I got to travel to the NG office this year to go to my second Pico Day party. I don't really have the patience to do a full write-up of my time in Newgrounds Land, but I would like to use this news post to highlight some of the interesting moments that happened:

- Getting to the event was a major pain in the ass. I had to drive 45 minutes from my house to the CVG airport so that I could take a plane from Cincinnati, Ohio to Charlotte, North Caroline so that I could get on a plane to go to Washington, D.C. where I had to use their metro system so I could get on a MegaBus which took me to downtown Philly where I had to use the SEPTA train sytem to reach the Glenside train system where I had to walk to the NG Office. I started at 7AM and didn't reach the office until 6PM. It was an ordeal.

- I got to meet @StrawberryClock, @PikaPetey, @Dudul, @liljim, @Jay, @Shikamarana, @SymbolCymbal, @PsychoGoldfish, @EJR, @RedMinus, @AlmightyHans, @Malachy, @WhirlGuy, @SardonicSamurai, @ColonelCheru, @Sabtastic, @yurgenburgen, and so many others that I'm forgetting to list for the the first time IRL. They were all cool people, but it's always a little jarring to actually meet the human being behind the user icon. I finally know just how lil' Liljim is now!

- I went to WAWA again. Great store. Would reccomend. Good Cotton Candy Milkshakes.

- Got a weather update from @WadeFulp. Also learned that one of his kids will be old enough for an NG account soon. Look out for that!

- Got to eat at the same Chinese food place that I went to last year. Imagine the look on the faces of the waiting staff at the restaurant when @Ryan, @Zachary, @Bill-Premo, @SymbolCymbal, @Shikamarana, @EJR, @Jay, and I strolled in looking to order a shitload of food. It was insanity. We also fought over the check for like a million years. 

- Had a super engaging conversation about Tetris and its gameplay mechanics with @Mike. Do you know how Tetris generates your pieces if a computer, by definition, can't be completely random? It's fascinating stuff and worth looking into. Mike then kicked my ass in Super Puzzle Fighter on the Xbox 360.

- I DIDN'T get to see @Captain or @Timmy at this year's event. Captain claimed that he had broken his arm right before the event and Timmy texted me and said that he was sick on the actual day of Pico Day. Both excuses sound like bullshit and the both owe me an apology and a beer. I still love them, though. @BrentheMan no-showed too, which sucked.

- I had the chance to eat at a really nifty pizza place called Pizza Brain with @Ornery, @lovingthedark, @CosmicDeath, and @Malachy. They had really good pizza and a totally amazing atmosphere. They were also next to an ice cream place that served grape milkshakes. I tried one and it wasn't too bad! I'm sticking with cherry, though. Following all of that, I got to go to Barcade. Malachy and I tried to beat TMNT: The Arcade Game there, but we got our asses kicked and ran out of quarters in like two minutes. Fun times!

- Played eight-player Super Smash Bros. games with lots of NG people. Nothing like rubbing elbows with @StrawberryClock and @Nogfish so that you can kick @Anti-Dark-Heart's ass because she's spamming the attack button when I'm cornered. JESUS CHRIST KELSEY. (Sorry @ThePivotsXDD)

- @Grub-Xer0 brought his World Heavyweight Championship title belt to the office and I beat him for it. I held the belt for most of Pico Day and was widely regarded as the greatest champion NG had ever seen, but @EJR cheated and took the belt from me for a while. I beat him in a rematch, though, and managed to hold onto the title until I retired. Grub then became champion after he won the Pico Day Royal Rumble. Here is a photo of me with my title.

- At one point, everybody started watching Robocop on the NG's office TV. Let me tell you that there's nothing quite like watching Robocop stab a man while sitting next to @TomFulp and @liljim

I'll probably add more to this list when I think of stuff. Remind me what I missed in the comments!

Also, here's a photo of me with @Luis (@Jonas photobombed it. What a prick!)




Posted by ZJ - December 12th, 2014

I got the chance to talk to Tom this week via my show on my college's student internet radio station. It was a blast to record this and I hope you guys might get some entertainment out of it. 


Listen here!